Sunday, October 2, 2011

"Procrastinistic..."

my hubby says i procrastinate on procrastinating... so he made up a new word for me... procrastinistic.  he loves me so much... and he knows i have great intentions.  just not always the best follow through... yet he loves me anyhow.  so i've been working on it.  most people make new years resolutions... i feel like i've been making new cancer resolutions...

one of my previous posts i mentioned i wanted to organize my house before surgery... i'm not sure which one, because i honestly have no memory (but knowing me, it was probably awhile ago)... and i just started yesterday.  so far i have an immaculate kitchen (or it was before my hubby got in there to cook, but he is such an amazing cook so even when he is messy it is well worth it- homemade chicken & dumplings)... 3 bags to donate from my bedroom... and a clean organized kids' room... the living room is mostly clean, i just need to organize my paperwork clutter... the bathroom isn't bad because that's the one room i stay on top of... basically i saved the worst for last, our bedroom... but sunday's productivity has almost been depleted... that leaves me monday and tuesday to finish up.  i am hoping to be done monday night, but we will see... i always have the best intentions...

a different post (again, i don't remember which one) i said i was trying to be less judgmental... this one i didn't procrastinate on.  but it is still a daily battle... for instance, at my son's back to school picnic (Picnic...) i was challenged... there was a mom that was dressed like it was a singles picnic, not a kids' picnic... not only that, but she liked to play damsel in distress... and if you knew me then you would know neither of those are my style... don't get me wrong, i used to dress that too when i was going to the bar... but i have never been the damsel in distress type- i've always been a do it yourself type of chick...  i caught myself letting my irritation with her consume me.  honestly, that is probably what distracted me from my normal heliophobe paranoia (being outside during peak sun hours)...  so, as you can see, i am still a work in progresss on not being so judgemental...

i am also trying not to procrastinate so much... but you can probably guess by the title of this post that hasn't been exactly the case.  in my own defense, i am getting better about it... before i probably would have procrastinated my organization goal until after surgery (even tho the goal part is before surgery)...  and i am realizing how much simpler it is to keep up when i dont put things off... so there is hope! (i will SOON include a post about how horrible procrastination is when it comes to checking your skin)

pessimistic is the other half of my hubby's made up adjective... which is truly ironic... when we first met he was the pessimist... and he loved my optimism.  well, times have changed... we seemed to have slowly switched roles... and it happened so gradually that we didn't notice until recently.  he and i are both geminis, split personalities to a degree...  and it seems as if we switched personalities in perfect balance.  even with all of that, i want my optimism back!!! i don't like feeling like eeyore... charlie brown... or any other sad sack that comes to mind... i don't know how to get there tho.  i continue trying, and i would like to think that is the important part...

my hope is after these procures wednesday i will continue to keep working on these changes... because i can see it is helping... feels like program de ja vu... "fake it 'til you make it"... and it's not so much faking it, as slow progression.  but like i said before patience isn't my strong point either... maybe that will work into my hubby's next new word.  (i crack me up ;) )

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