Scattered...

i know i disappeared for awhile... sorry.  i kinda figured i have complained enough about interferon... and if i didn't have anything new to say i stayed quiet... then i had something new happen and i stayed quiet... then the melanoma community lost an amazing warrior... so here i am again.

let me start with the new thing that happened... after a shot i had a large swelled up bruise in the location of the injection... turns out it was a cellulitis... and i think wikipedia explains better than i do...
Cellulitis is a localized or diffuse inflammation of connective tissue with severe inflammation of dermal and subcutaneous layers of the skin. Cellulitis can be caused by normal skin flora or by exogenous bacteria, and often occurs where the skin has previously been broken: cracks in the skin, cuts, blisters, burns, insect bites, surgical wounds, intravenous drug injection or sites of intravenous catheter insertion. Skin on the face or lower legs is most commonly affected by this infection, though cellulitis can occur on any part of the body. The mainstay of therapy remains treatment with appropriate antibiotics, and recovery periods last from 48 hours to six months. 
i was very fortunate that i was immediately put on antibiotics and it went away-ish... i don't have that particular infection anymore... but have since noticed that now my injections cause a rash.  i am just grateful they haven't been bruising up, that was really scary. 

i am also dealing with insurance issues... and a few other stresses that made me go underground for awhile... i know writing this helps me process everything, but i lost sight of that recently.  i felt like all i was doing was being whiny... ya know they warn you interferon will affect your emotions... but i didn't realize how much until recently.  i have 2 little people, and i thought pregnancy was an emotional time... but in comparison i was a rock then. 

that brings me to the loss of another amazing warrior... as part of an online melanoma community it is hard to hear about the loss of another melanoma warrior... but some are harder to hear about than others... maybe its more similar personalities... maybe its similar family dynamics... whatever it is- some news is harder to hear than others.  unfortunately we have lost a few warriors recently... maybe it was all that added together... i don't know.  but all this loss has got me sitting here typing again... in hopes that i don't just help myself, but others...

sorry if this post is hard to follow... i feel kinda scattered recently... and i have a dermatologist appointment tomorrow... will try to post more regularly...